A few days ago I came home from a bloggers conference. First ever for me. Was it fun? Yes! Was it intimidating? Big, fat yes.
I met amazing women. But amazement can do funny things. When standing in the presence of shiny stars one can start to wonder where their own bottle of Brasso went.
It’s easy to feel validated in your dreams and callings when the only person you compare yourself to is yourself. After all, if you gave it one lick of effort you’re moving in the right direction, right?
HOWEVER…
Validation is a nasty bugger.
Rarely is he satisfied with the solitaire efforts of brave hearts and calloused hands. No…he wants more. More attention. More fame. More big. More loud. More likes, More fans. More. More. More.
The conference found me wanting:
- More bracelets.
- More boots.
- More followers.
- More publications.
- More friends.
- More dialect (Strike that. A better dialect than my “Fargoesque” I’m from South Dakoootaaah.)
- More confidence.
The last one is when Holy Spirit decided enough was enough. I needed re-direction and He lovingly provided it. I was in the bathroom stall moments before my pitch. Stomach was turning. Upper lip was sweating. All the while I was wondering how I could pretend I was actually using the bathroom instead of just practicing my “pick me I’m wonderful speech.”
“Would my feet look like this in a seated position?”
Good gravy. At a certain point a person realizes it’s time to get over themselves. The sweat on my lip, knot in my stomach, “Do I look like I’m peeing?” moment solidified something God’s been hammering home for a couple of years. My writing…my speaking…my passion are in no way, shape or form validated by anyone other than God.
That my friends is liberating. But it’s freeing for only one reason.
God’s stamp of approval has nothing to do with us. We’ve not earned it (never will). No matter how “successful” we are or how pure-hearted and sanctified we become-God’s endorsement of us will only find its beginning and end in the cross.
The pressure is off!
That means…
I’m free!
I can be me!
I can quit practicing and truly pee. (I told you the pressure was off.)
I left that bathroom with an empty bladder, a full heart and thoughts transformed. Holy Spirit reinforced a truth that’s been brewing in me——–
I want to pursue obscurity.
Less of me means more of Him:
- More truth.
- More power.
- More passion.
- More purpose.
- More dreams (in others) stoked into being.
Obscurity is counter-culture. Rebel Jesus modeled it well. He wanted the Father to shine. DoAheads, would you consider tossing out your Brasso along with me? Let’s leave our figurative bathroom stalls behind. Let’s embrace obscurity. Let’s practice contentment. Let’s rest in the knowledge that loving Him by loving others is a simple pursuit and the results (obscure or otherwise) are in His capable hands.
I pray we remember that God loves us deeply and that He sees…knows… and cherishes every breath we take.
May that be enough. May it always be enough.
“Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ.” Colossians 3:4 MSG
{I hope you’ll hop over to Suzie Eller’s #livefree community in the next few days. Beautiful souls are sharing their stories of what it means to be validated.}
Your DoAhead Friend,
I love this! I, too, have been to conferences, or even just listening to podcasts and think I need to do more, be more, have more, etc. I’m beginning to realize (and God is showing me) when I follow his purpose and plan, I will prosper. #LiveFreeThursday
Aaaah yes! His purpose. His plan. We prosper. Thank you Jesus. So glad you stopped Amanda! 🙂
This. This is my favorite. Amen, sister!
Amen right back at ya! Grateful for your shiny face in this space!
Yes! May He always be enough!!! Love this, Cindy. I always love your words and your transparency. Thank you for being YOU! #livefreeThursday
Missed “the girls” last week. Grateful to be back. Blessings friend (genuinely grateful you took the time to hop over)!
Amen! Yes and Ament! This: Let’s practice contentment. Let’s rest in the knowledge that loving Him by loving others is a simple pursuit and the results (obscure or otherwise) are in His capable hands.
It speaks volumes! I spoke with Him this morning about a heart not right because of something I thought not big enough. I repented.
Love you, you are a bright and shining star to Him and me! We can still get a few more pairs of boots, right?
Yes. Yes you can get more boots. The 11th commandment, “You can always get more boots.” (Love you dear…glad you stopped.:) )
Probably most of us felt a certain amount of intimidation at Allume. You wrote about your insecurities very well–(love the bathroom stall talk)–and this blog has a great vibe and info. Thanks for your post!
Friend, I could write a BOOK on bathroom stall talks! 🙂 So grateful for your presence in this space. Have a wonderful day Melodie!
Cheering you on, friend! Sounds like the best bathroom stall talk ever. <3
A new take on “potty talk?” (Thanks for stopping Suzie! :))
I LOVE this statement: I want to pursue obscurity. Less of me=MORE OF HIM! I am so glad we found each other, we are going to be dear friends…I can just feel it!
Grateful for your presence here Sarah! God is so good, so very good. Isn’t it funny how obscurity in Him can make us feel like we have the world’s attention? I think it’s because it’s HIS attention that we’re wired for! Blessings friend…excited to get to know you!
A come to Jesus moment in the bathroom! I love it! Thank you for your honesty and wisdom. #livefreeThursday
I love seeing you here Cindy. The #livefree community has been such a blessing. I count you part of that! Have a great weekend!
Love, love, love this post! So open, honest, and transparent…it was my first year at allume also, and I could relate with your words…it actually helped me realize I’m happy writing my blog posts every week to share how our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ encourages me…He’s more than enough! Many blessings to you ❤️
Genuinely grateful for your presence here Beth! And even though we know He’s enough it helps to hear it from one another (I know there are times I need the reminder!) Have a wonderful week!