The Language of Love


The corn burner is running. Its auger is sending a melodic trickle of corn to the flame. The steady feed of fuel keeps the fire burning and the result is a heated house. Strike that, the result is a warm home.


Valentines Day is coming. It’s a wonderful opportunity to love on those we love. What a great reminder for an annual show of affection. And yet…the sound of corn trickling begs the question “How am I doing in my continuous ‘feeding of the flame?”  I think of Doc especially. After 26 years of marriage it is easy to take for granted flames that burned in early years.


I recently stumbled on a little book I purchased over a decade ago. It’s full of ideas for romancing your spouse. I was convicted as I leafed through it. It also brought to mind Gary Chapman’s wonderful take on the 5 Love Languages (Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, Physical Touch).  Chapman says each person has a different love language and that unless we experience “I love you” in our native tongue we may not really feel loved.  If you and I don’t speak our spouses’ (or children’s) love language they may not know we care!


Below are 15 ideas for speaking a love language to your spouse in the day’s approaching Valentines.

  • Read aloud to him from his favorite book. (Quality Time.)

  • Offer a back rub. (Physical Touch.)

  • Prepare a favorite meal. (Act of Service.)

  • Watch his favorite TV show with him. (Quality Time.)

  • Before he falls asleep whisper in his ear, “Thank you for all your hard work.” (Words of Affirmation.)

  • Look for a tool sale, surprise him with a new set of _____________. (Gifts).

  • Hand him a cup of coffee and granola bar as he heads out the door. (Act of Service.)

  • Lay his favorite magazine on his pillow before bedtime. (Act of Service)

  • Surprise him with tickets for the game and go with him. (Quality Time.)

  • Set a red rose with an invitation for “alone time” outside the door. Let him find it right when he gets home. If kiddos are around…make the note something that can be “redeemed” later! (Physical Touch).

  • Put toothpaste on his toothbrush in the morning. (Act of Service.)

  • Take an inventory of his clothes. If he needs something, purchase it and surprise him by simply placing it in his dresser. (Gifts.)

  • Turn on the electric blanket on his side of the bed so it’s warm when he “tucks in”. (Act of Service.)

  • Fill up his vehicle with gas and run it through the car wash.(Act of Service.)

  • Leave a note on the dashboard that tells him how much you appreciate him. (Words of Affirmation.)

Wouldn’t it be fun to challenge ourselves to “speak” love to our family members (whether it be our husbands or children) at least one time per day? I’m challenging myself!  I’ll report back to you in three weeks (Valentines Day) and let you know how it goes! Wanna join me?


Ready, set, Go!!

Your DoAhead Friend,

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