My guy. Oh mercy. If you could only meet my guy. I don’t talk about Him too much in this space. He’s private. Actually a more accurate word would be dignified.

Don’t misunderstand I would never say that the blogosphere lacks dignity, but for those of us (me included) whose planet spins in the blog galaxy, sometime we can be a little too transparent.

Not Doc. He’s got a heart as big as the Grand Canyon but he doesn’t wear it on his sleeve. Perhaps that explains the shift in my own heart when his voice cracked with emotion the other day.

Would you believe that of all things our “deep discussion” was about supper? It’s been Def-Con Cuckoo around here lately. We’ve been living in the basement for over nine months and the remodel that’s going on overhead is escalating. Big time.

Contractors have become part of the family. If we were Bar Mitzvah people these folks would be invited. Having said that the swing of tool belts and herd of workman’s hooves overhead at 7:30 am can tug hard at an already unraveling rope.

The remodel has shown no mercy in terms of deadlines and yet isn’t it funny how the rest of life doesn’t go on hold?

Yours truly has two speaking engagements in May. I’m uber excited. I’m also uber overwhelmed. Consequently, one of the first things to go has been a few evening meals at the table.

And I. Hate.That.

Fast forward to my lament to Doc. “I’m so sorry babe. I really need to finish these revisions and it was a crazy day with the remodel. I don’t have anything prepared for supper tonight.”

He quickly cut me off. “We’re fine. Don’t worry about us, we’ve got this!”

But then he followed by saying something that made me feel like I was falling in love with him for the first time.

He confessed, “I’m lost without you babe.” *Crack in voice.

Following his heartfelt admission, he went on to explain that he genuinely wanted me to work on my talks… but he also wanted me to understand how much he likes doing life together.

Boom.

It was romance over grilled cheese. We were surrounded by sheet rock dust, pounding overhead and no privacy yet somehow (for a solid sixty seconds) the world stopped.

My speaking commitments and the remodel details were swept away. All I wanted to do in that moment was whatever the guy that couldn’t live without me needed.

I only had eyes for him.

His heartfelt admission was like the rush of spring’s first heavy rain. It pushed aside the rubbish at the end of my remarkably plugged downspout and reminded me of how I felt when we first met. Nothing, no one else mattered.

Isn’t it crazy how life can make us forget?

The same thing can happen between me and Jesus. Deadlines, duties…all my imagined and often self-imposed “must- dos” make me forget. But I know, that I know, that I know——– Jesus is my first love.

My prayer?

Jesus, help me take time to hear you. You whisper love to me constantly. You tell me you never want to live without me. The cross bears proof of that.

The constancy of spring blooms testify to your faithfulness

My clean sheets and fridge full of food are over-looked examples of your merciful provision.

Thank you for loving me with a first-kind-of-love. I want to do the same.

Sometimes I just forget——–forgive me Jesus.

How about you?

Has this Martha world robbed you of the Mary-Eyes-Only-For-Jesus kind of life?

Today I’m praying that His Spirit will touch ours and remind us of just how much He cares. I pray we’ll hear the crack in His voice as he whispers His vulnerable desire to be with us.

And then I pray for the miracle of:

• the shift in thinking that causes,
• the shift in feeling that prompts,
• the shift of living life from the perspective of first love.

I pray we experience what Brother Lawrence called “practicing the presence of God”. Intimacy with Him while peeling potatoes. Fellowship with Him while driving to work. Partnership with Him while parenting.

Jesus, thank you for falling-in love with us. Teach us how to daily fall in love with you.

“We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19

{Be sure to hop over to Suzie Eller’s #livefree community today! Many more thoughts on falling in love with Jesus!}

Your DoAhead Friend,

Cindy